How to ForgiveYouTube↗  IA↗(long shot)
Education  315.6K views 7.7K likes 243 dislikes   07 Dec 2015
The School of Life 9.7M subscribers N/A YouTube↗


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Let’s say you just had a big row with someone close to you.
Vamos dizer que acabou de ter uma discussão com alguém próximo de você.
They behaved terribly, maybe broke something and said something hideous to you.
Se comportaram terrivelmente, talvez quebraram algo seu ou lhe falaram algo hediondo.
It’s so tempting to give up on them and just hate them, but there’s another way.
É tentador a vontade de desistir deles e apenas odiá-los, mas há outro caminho.
Here’s a big idea
Eis aqui uma grande ideia.
People are almost never simply bad.
As pessoas não são sempre más.
What they are far more often is scared.
Estão mais vezes, na verdade, com medo.
When they behave in really horrible ways, it tends to be because they’re extremely anxious for some reason or another.
Quando se comportam em péssimas formas, tende a ser por estarem extremamente ansiosos por algum motivo.
Though their behavior can seem strong, no one who actually felt strong would be all arsey like that.
Mesmo que seu comportamento seja visto como forte, ninguém realmente forte seria estúpido a esse ponto.
The mature response shouldn’t therefore be to increase tension and flare up in return
A resposta madura não deve ser para aumentar a tensão e se estressar de volta
but to strive to see all you’ve got in front of you is someone who can’t cope.
mas para se esforçar a ver que a pessoa não consegue lidar com tudo.
We are so aligned to the idea that it’s patronizing to think of people as younger than they are
Estamos tão atentos a ideia que, já virou padrão, pensar e tratar as pessoas como se fossem mais novas
we forget that it’s also, at times, the greatest privilege to look beyond someone’s adult self
nos esquecemos que também é, de vez em quando, o maior privilégio vermos além do lado adulto de alguém
in order to engage with and forgive the anxious or disappointed, furious or inarticulate child within
para criar um laço e perdoar a ansiedade ou desapontamento, fúria ou infância má resolvida na criança dentro de nós.
There’s another thing to bear in mind when all you can see is a person’s weak points.
Há outra coisa a se suportar quando tudo o que você de alguém são pontos fracos.
Weak points are always linked to strong points and vice versa.
Pontos fracos são sempre ligados a pontos fortes, vice versa.
So, for example, the strength of thoroughness is always going to bring with, in other contexts, the weakness of pedantry.
Então, por exemplo, a força da perfeição vem sempre junto a, em alguns contextos, fraqueza pedante.
Creative brilliance might well be inseparable from logistical unreliability.
Uma criatividade brilhante talvez esteja inseparável de uma lógica que não corresponde com a realidade.
People who are fantastic leaders at work are likely to be seriously difficult around domestic chores.
Pessoas que são fantásticos líderes em seus trabalhos estão sujeitos a terem muita dificuldade com tarefas domésticas.
The reason for keeping this in mind is that we often encounter people’s weaknesses
A razão para manter isto em mente é que, com frequência, olhamos a fraqueza das pessoas
at moments when we’re in danger of losing sight of their strengths.
em momentos de estarmos perdendo de vista seus pontos fortes.
At certain points, all it seems we’re bumping into are the weaknesses.
Em certo ponto, parece estarmos sempre nos deparando com as fraquezas.
We wonder “how did I end up in this relationship or hanging out with this person?”
Nos perguntamos "como acabei chegando nesse relacionamento ou saindo com essa pessoa?"
During tough times, we only see the flaws.
Durante tempos difíceis, vemos apenas as falhas.
We are failing to step back enough and ask a really vital question
Estamos falhando em dar um passo atrás e perguntamos algo realmente importante
not just what are these people’s weaknesses
não apenas pelo o que são as fraquezas desta pessoa
but what are the strengths of which these annoying traits are the unfortunate shadow sides.
mas quais são os pontos fortes que fazem dos traços irritantes apenas no lado da sombra.
Everyone is going to have the weaknesses of their strengths.
Todos tem as fraquezas de seus pontos fortes.
Forgiving people must mean doing everything we can to keep their strengths in view
Perdoar os outros significa fazer tudo o que podemos para manter seus pontos fortes em vista
at moments where their weaknesses are only too painfully apparent.
nos momentos que suas fraquezas são dolorosamente aparentes.
if you like our films, take a look at our shop
Caso goste de nossos filmes, dê uma olhada na nossa loja
theschooloflife.com/shop
theschooloflife.com/shop
You'll find lots of thoughtful books, games, stationery and more
Encontrará vários livros que te farão pensar, jogos, nossa papelaria e mais.
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